Surviving Spouses of Military Members
October 22, 2006Where does the time go. I just spent another birthday of the loved one I lost. I’ve heard the saying, “You don’t get over it but you get though it” and that is so true. After fifteen years, I still get melancholy during that week. I just can’t help it. But life is good. My faith is strong. I’m still working at a job that I love. I am now a Foster Mother. Yes, that’s right. I just keep the infant or toddler (0 - 3 is what I’m licensed for) on weekends as that’s all I can handle. Yes, I’ll admit it. This taxes me to the limit but it is such fun to be around little ones again. I dearly love it and enjoy it to the max. When I decided to get into the Foster Care Ministry last Spring, my friends came to my rescue and gave me all kinds of baby things they no longer used or needed. I have everything I need, plus some things I don’t use. Since I’m “respite”, I don’t use a lot of the little sleepers I have on hand but as long as I’m doing this, I can’t box them up as one never knows when they might come in handy. So my little three bedroom trailer is humming again. I had to get permission from the trailer court to do this as I live in a senior court! ! ! As long as don’t disturb the neighbors, we’ll be in business. The play pen my young friend “gave” to me sure does come in handy for the toddlers. I haven’t used the porta-crib another older friend gave me but it’s folded in another closet in case I want to keep an infant in my room overnight. I am working on learning how to feed a Downs Syndrome newborn and I’m sure I’ll want him close to me at night once we learn how to get his milk down him instead of all over him. He’s doing great as he gets a little older. This brings back such sweet memories of when I had a family and our children were small. Even thought our children were as healthy as any child could be, they are so precious and so innocent. I love my life. . . . I have learned that we have to reach out and take hold of those things that we excel at. It doesn’t drop to us out of the sky. In fact, if I had asked most of my friends, they would have discouraged me from taking in infants at my age. . . So, you see, I know my own heart better than they do. We are still losing service men (boys, actually) too close to home and that’s always a prickle in the old heart. We lost another Gold Star Mother recently, too. I went to her funeral and read a poem honoring her as a Gold Star Mother. No organization honored her as she no longer belonged to any thing since she was elderly and could not get out. I can’t forget these dear souls myself so I had the honor of letting the family know that they are not forgotten. Don’t forget to live each day to the fullest and enjoy the freedom that we have. ~ Carolyn | 
